A Peek Into Gorgeous Golding’s Mind™: Who Are You?

EPISODE 024

By Gorgeous Golding™️

Many of us complain about our own ancestors for all the bad things they did, but forget that they were part of the movie, the experience, or whatever we choose to call it. Or maybe even a witness.

I often give this illustration:

If you’re wearing white and you go through a tunnel full of crap, no matter how careful you are, two things must happen.

Yes, you were not the tunnel, and most certainly not all the shitty stuff in there, but you went through it.

Two things:

You either pick up a stain, which, of course, you shouldn’t be blamed for. You can’t be too careful in a world full of shit.

Or you pick up a smell, which is usually a stench.

Right?

You were not any of those things, and just like the white clothes you’re wearing, you’re innocent.

You were careful while going through the tunnel. In fact, you may have complained and cussed out the person or persons who filled the tunnel with shit.

I mean, who wouldn’t?

Anyone who saw you come out of the tunnel would definitely understand why you smell like hell.

Those were not your fault.

But it’s totally your responsibility to ensure that the people who were not a part of the scene of what you went through do not find you in that condition even many days after, with stains all over your beautiful, innocent heart and a smelly reputation like the one you complained about in the past.

This is how our society and family form us.

Let me give a literal example:

You could find a young couple who, when they start having kids, usually take the children to church.

And as the children get older, the attendance of either parent or both drops, until they only drop off the kids at church, or they hand them over to a neighbour, family member, or friend who could take them along to church while they stay back.

Up until adolescence and the teenage years, they start forcing their kids to church because, at this point, the kids would rather stay at home like Mum and Dad, playing or watching TV.

And they even punish them for staying back from church while they can’t remember the last time they were committed to a church or even attended a church service themselves.

And when the child is badly behaved, they blame it on their refusal to get close to God.

This repeatedly happens until adulthood, when the children are finally committed to their personal decision about their faith.

You’d then hear the same parent talking about how vain and fraudulent their religious beliefs are, and how they’re wasting their lives away chasing after religion and serving a foreign God.

This could go on and on until the same set of children become parents and, in most cases, repeat the pattern of their ancestors.

This is not limited to religion alone.

You find some children from abusive homes who, even though they hated their parents and criticised their behaviour, ended up being exactly like them.

Some could be promiscuity, lying, cheating, stealing, et cetera.

You know why this happens?

Because they are not intentional and conscious of their experiences and the effect those experiences have on them.

They are carried away complaining about what is happening around them, forgetting that they are both cast members of the same movie and, by consequence, sitting at the same round table.

If you’re so carried away by what is happening without thinking about the psychological effect on you just by witnessing the experience, sooner or later, the plate is going to get to your table.

And because you were lost in the happenings, your reflex would be to do exactly what the next person before you did.

Why?

Because you were not conscious enough to reflect and introspect on the impact of what you just experienced.

You simply experience and forget.

Why?

Because without consciousness, experiences are without meaningful impact.

Without consciousness, experiences are without lasting effect.

You allowed life to pass through you, registered its presence in you without your knowledge, how much more your consent.

Little wonder your own actions surprise you sometimes.

It wasn’t a surprise.

You just weren’t paying attention when the invitation was given, and you collected it without knowing.

This is just the life of a lot of people.

You’re living, but simply living another person’s experience.

Some have lived and died without ever giving themselves the opportunity to live their own life.

I mean, the only wiring and formation they have is from an external source.

Nothing from within them.

In fact, their real identity is like a stranger to them.

Why?

Because they were never present at the gate of their own minds to question and scrutinise all that life delivers.

Access is free, and over time, life forms an algorithm for their lives.

And when asked why they are the way they are, they simply say:

“This is who I am.”

Obviously, that’s who you are now.

But is that who you choose to be, or who you grew into?

Those are two different things.

And until we begin to ask the right questions, we’ll remain trapped in this circle endlessly.

So, my dear reader, who are you?

Can you walk yourself through the formation of the person you are right now?

If you had the chance to become a different person entirely, in and out, would you still choose this very self of yours?

If yes, why?

If no, then why?

What do you think you can do within your power to be the person you would like to be?

Take your time in answering those questions.

Note down your answers.

Lastly, I would highly recommend that you start living with consciousness.

Conscious of your environment, your experiences, your emotions, your feelings, your thoughts, your intentions, your choices, and your interests.

Always ask yourself:

“Why do I like this or feel like this?”

From your answer, you’d know if it’s from a need or from an influence.

If it’s from a need, why is it a need?

If it’s from an influence, why did you accept that particular influence?

When you question things like this, it helps your clarity, forms and protects your choices, and helps you live a purposeful life.

If not, you might just be saying yes to another person’s mistake, in the disguise of an influence.

Okay?

Thank you for reading.

I hope there was something in it for you.

~ Gorgeous Golding™️

Purpose. Clarity. Influence.

Instagram: @gorgeous_golding
Substack: @gorgeousgolding
Email: gorgeousgolding@gmail.com